Sunday, June 12, 2011

Surgery day tomorrow!

Thank you to everyone who has called, sent e-mails/FB messages, dropped off goodies of one kind of another.  Tomorrow is Hannah's big day.  She will be at NY Children's Hospital probably thru Wed or Thurs and then transferred to Children's Specialized Hospital in NJ.  As soon as we have an address for her, we'll send it along since many have asked.

We got to my brother's place yesterday and have had a great day and a half of playing with family, eating good food and having fun.  The girls have not said much about what's to come.  We did tell them what's going to happen over the next few weeks but we purposely kept it simple and figured we'd field their questions as they came.  And not many have really come.  I'm thinking this might be a little self-preservation on their part.  Ignorance is bliss and all that.

My own approach has been not that far from theirs in some ways.  I prepared a TON for getting here, to the pre-surgery "staging area", and everyone has everything they need to be away from home for awhile, in various locations.  But as far as thinking much beyond getting here, I'm trying not to do a whole lot of that.  It makes my stomach hurt.  One step at a time, lots of deep breaths and a big leap of faith will hopefully get me through this.

But it's been hard to keep my creeping anxieties totally under wraps today.  I took a lot of pictures and video of Hannah as we played on the playground, looking at her body and noticing how strong she has gotten, and yet how tight and constrained her muscles are.  I keep wondering: what will her body look like after? how will it be to see that tightness removed? how will it be to see her struggle to do the most basic things after she has fought so hard to get the independence she has now?

Deep breaths, one step at a time...

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

thinking of and praying for Hannah,her medical team, and all of you who love her.

(mom of 6 whose youngest is a 2yo with spastic quad cp)